Parasocial Relationships & the Dangers that Come With it
By Hannah Poulos
A parasocial relationship is when a person forms a one-sided relationship with either a celebrity, prominent person, or fictional character, as defined by Giles and Maltby. The term “parasocial relationship” was formed by psychologists Donald Horton and Richard Whorl in 1956. These two men studied the relationships among prominent people on tv and the viewers watching (Brisco, 2021). This parasocial relationship happens when a fan knows everything about this prominent person, and because of this they feel a close connection with them. These relationships exist even though there is not a chance of it being reciprocated from the other side (Giles and Maltby, 2021).
An explanation behind a parasocial relationship was found by Giles and Maltby in an absorption addiction model. They identified three different levels when it came to these relationships with these prominent people. In a large-scale survey, Giles and Maltby used the Celebrity Attitude Scale to find this information. Level one is defined as being the most common level. At this level people look at these prominent people as a source of entertainment and topic when talking to peers. To be in level two regarding parasocial relationships, people make the relationship deeper and more intensified than level one. People do this by picturing and seeing themselves in a romantic relationship with a prominent person. People may even know everything about this person’s social life, for example, what they eat and wear as their style. Level two is most common among teenagers obsessing over their favorite celebrity. Level three is when, as Giles and Maltby stated, the relationship is borderline pathological. At this level a person forms an extreme sense of worship towards any prominent person. Giles and Maltby stated that this person “has obsessive fantasies about the celebrity, spends large sums of money to obtain memorabilia and may engage in illegal activities such as stalking. At this level, it is also usual for people to believe that if only they were given a chance to meet their favorite celebrity in person, their feelings would be reciprocated” (Giles and Maltby, 2021).
John Bowlby, a British psychiatrist used his attachment theory to find an explanation behind why people would form parasocial relationships. Bowlby’s theory predicted that these relationships are formed when an individual did not have a strong connection and bond with their primary caregiver during their childhood. This leads people to use parasocial relationships as a substitute during their adulthood. A further explain states that “ Moreover, according to the description of attachment types described by Ainsworth suggest that individuals who formed insecure-resistant relationships with their caregiver in early childhood will be more likely to form parasocial relationships, as they are too afraid of the criticism and rejection that are a part of real life relationships” ( Giles and Molby, 2021). Cindy Hazan from Cornell, and Phillip Shaver from University of California found that this upbringing leads to these people having clingy and jealous traits during their adulthood. This makes it difficult for these people to have healthy, committed and sustainable romantic relationships. With their parasocial relationships, people are able to partake in their fantasy relationships without enduring any heartbreak or rejection according to Giles and Molby.
With all of that being said, it may not come to your surprise that these parasocial relationships lead to problems and bring about issues for the person involved. There is a level of delusion involved for someone to entertain this type of relationship as explained by Adhora Ahmed from The Daily Star. He states that these fans have the delusion and forget that these prominent figures have no reciprocal relationship with them. Often forgetting that whichever prominent image they are so infatuated by, is most likely not the reality of this prominent person’s image. Celebrities for example, have a certain image put out into the world for them, usually being heavily controlled by whoever they have a contract with, meaning their personality is never fully represented. This leads to delusions for the person with the parasocial relationship and can often lead to them putting themselves at risk to draw attention to their perceived ideas on this prominent person’s personality and life (Ahmed, 2020).
Adhora Ahmed stated that these delusions will cause a toll to be taken on this individual and their own interpersonal relationships. If these obsessions are being made then this certain individual will only be able to give to this prominent person and not be able to give enough of themselves to the friends and family around them. Parasocial relationships will lead to unbalanced relationships in a person’s personal life. This may even lead to resentment or abandonment causing an individual to only depend on a prominent person even more.
Elsie Waters from Tigers Newspaper, commented on the topic of problems with parasocial relationships as well, She noted that these relationships have become more threatening and available with the way social media is today. Waters stated that, “ Social media gives fans unprecedented access to their favorite celebrities. Today, a fan can get a seemingly unfiltered view into a figure’s life without an intermediary. One doesn’t have to appear on MTV or Rolling Stone magazine to address their audience like they did just a decade ago. They can simply open their phone” (Waters, 2021). She explains in her article that social media today gives a false sense of prominent peoples lives. This often leads to people so wrapped up in these celebrities that they will defend them and stand up for them even if this person has done wrong. This can lead to the wrong people being in the spotlight and holding an amount of power that they do not deserve. Waters used Shane Dawson as an example. Dawson was a you-tuber with a huge fan following, however many of his videos included racism, humor that regarded pedophilia, and many more problematic topics. Many people had been wrapped up in him and their perception of him that they defended his wrong doing and he continued to make money and gain fame off doing so. (Waters, 2021)
Benit Kutalu wrote an article defining the dangers of parasocial relationships. Kutalu thought that it was important to state that, taken to an extreme, “the individual watching might feel so attached to their online buddy that they start engaging in irrational and potentially dangerous activities such as donating large sums of cash to them or trying to impress them in a strange way” (Kutalu, 2021). Kutalu used a strong example to show and visualize how parasocial relationships can go wrong. He used John Hinckley Jr. as his example, the story explains that Hinckley was a relatively normal guy who had an infatuation with Jodie Foster, an actor from the 1970’s. Hinckley’s parasocial relationship was so strong that he would attempt to call Foster, in his attempts he was ignored, so Hinckley went to a different extreme to get her attention. His solution to get her attention and win her over was to shoot the president. So, on March 30,1981 Hinckley shot at President Ronald Reagan leaving him and four others injured. He was then sentenced to jail. This may be extreme, however, it is the outcome of a parasocial relationship and should bring attention to the fact that these are not healthy and lead to problems (Kutalu, 2021).
